I was almost 40, and at that time 40 felt so OLD. Even as I stood at the precipice. I was officially, by most standards, middle aged. I hate that phrase; middle aged. I certainly didnt feel 40. I felt as if I had finally begun to get the hang of this short span of time that we call life.
I only remember snippets of my youth. Im not certain if this is due to a traumatic event, or if I am normal, and simply remember just as much as anyone else does. One thing is for certain, I wish I could recall so much more of my youth.
The day before my tenth birthday, I recall loudly announcing to anyone that would listen, that I would never again be in the single digits. I proudly proclaimed this fact, as my heart and mind filled with pride. While making this proclamation, I was kicking and thrusting my little legs as hard as I could, in my never-ending effort to soar over the bar. I had long desired to one day be the first to swing in a complete circle over the bar that held my swing. I had pretty much convinced myself that I would be. ( I am still in the process of attaining this long ago goal I set for myself.)
That day, on the swings, was more than 30 years ago. Time seems to fly by faster now, even faster than I had hoped to, that day on the playground.
Though quite a bit of time has passed since that day, I have spent a significant amount reflecting on the events and people that I have seen come and go throughout my life.
A pattern emerged from my reflections. Very few people who entered my life, stayed. In the begining, I would grieve every departure. It seemed, that when their time with me was up, they would leave and never look back. Now, I view these departures in a new and more philosophical way. These people had to leave my life’s story, in order to continue their own. However, not before I made some small, yet significant mark or influence on their lives, as most had left on mine. Some small change of direction, if you will. That’s when it hit me.
A stepping stone! We are all each other’s stepping stones! I was not forgotten, my role in their story had simply come to an end. Be it for now or forever. I now suspect it’s like this for everyone.
Posted by Fran Stone using “WordPress” for Android.